"From Baker to Knight: Why Embracing My 7 Passionate Lovers Was the Best Decision I Ever Made!"

ALICE SETCHFIELD smiles and snuggles up to the second lover she has slept with this week.

In two days, there will be a different man in her bed — and with any luck, his wife too.

That’s when things really heat up.

Alice, 39, loves so much she has drawn up a roster of six men and a woman who she is intimate with on rotation — and who she brings into the bed is dictated by her mood.

But she isn’t having an affair. She is single, and all her partners know about each other.

Keeping their identities anonymous, Alice explains her nicknames for each of her lovers so she does not mix them up.

She says: “If I want a mind-blowing I call The Baker — he brings pastries — and if I fancy kink play it’s The Director I choose because he calls the shots.

“When I feel in need of good conversation and some intellectual stimulation I ring The Knight, and if I am feeling really in the mood I call The Smiths, the couple who I have sex with.

“Another is The Gardener — he does that job for a living and is more sensual.

“Lastly, there’s the Tin Man, who is a welder, and his availability is one of his plus points.”

Alice got into the habit of giving lovers nicknames when she first started .

She recalls: “I matched with a lot of Daves and Jameses and I needed a way to distinguish them from each other when I saved them in my phone.

“The habit has stuck. It’s also more discreet if I’m talking about them to friends.”

Alice’s roster works like clockwork — she sees some lovers weekly, others monthly. She watches TV with some, goes on dates with others, or they will meet up at sex parties.

But there’s a common theme — each time she sees them it involves sex.

“It’s all very fluid,” she explains. “It depends how I feel and if they’re available.

“I have a high libido so I love sex, but these are too.”

Alice, who lives in , turned to when her 11-year ended in June 2024.

She is among a growing number of people turning their backs on traditional relationships. Around one in three people — 31 per cent — believe is no longer realistic.

Alice says: “I can’t see myself ever being in a conventional monogamous relationship again. One person can’t tick all your boxes and meet all your needs for life.

“It can become routine and you lose the passion and fun. I think I’d find monogamy stifling if I ever tried it again.”

Twice-divorced TV presenter , 65, has openly had multiple partners for more than a decade, dubbing them her “special friends”.

Meanwhile, the user base for Feeld, a for open-minded singles and couples, rose annually by an average of 30 per cent from 2022 to 2025.

Growing up, Alice never envisaged becoming — the term used to describe someone who has multiple partners.

She says: “I was that little girl who’d put on a white dress and pretend to be getting married, and I always wanted a family.”

In February 2013, when she was 27, Alice met James* at a ballroom dancing class. He proposed in May and they got married five months later in Wimborne, .

Alice, who was working as a midwife at the time, settled into a conventional life.

She says: “I was utterly besotted with him and it all felt very romantic. He made me feel safe and secure and all my friends were getting married and having babies.

“Although some of my family said the relationship moved a bit quick, it felt right.”

However, within a year cracks began to appear.

Alice suffered from Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder, a hormonal condition which triggers severe symptoms including anxiety and .

Alice tried antidepressants and the contraceptive pill but neither helped. At 30, she felt she had no option but to have a hysterectomy.

She says: “It was devastating. I’d always wanted to be a mother but PMDD has a strong hereditary component and I couldn’t risk having a daughter and putting her through the same hell every month.

“I gave up my work as a midwife. It was too painful to know I wouldn’t be a mum. I became an educator within the instead.”

With her hopes of having a traditional family in tatters, Alice’s marriage started falling apart.

She says: “Knowing we’d never have a family was part of it. If we weren’t going to have the traditional marriage with children it seemed a bit pointless.

“Our sex life was OK but never great. But ultimately we weren’t compatible anyway. We had different perspectives on life.”

In June 2024, Alice left the marriage and went to live with her best friend Hannah and her husband. She has been there ever since.

Others assumed they were a throuple, but when Alice started dating again two months later she had her sights set elsewhere.

She says: “I’d checked out of my marriage long before I left, so I was ready to start dating again quickly. But I didn’t want another traditional relationship.

“Polyamory appealed. I wanted to flirt with multiple people and not feel as though I was cheating. I’ve never cheated and never would — honestly is important.

“I wanted fun, and I never wanted to feel tied down again. My late grandmother had been a swinger, and I’d always been intrigued by her life.”

In August 2024, Alice signed up for and Feeld — and since then she has had a constant flow of lovers.

She once had 12 men on rotation but has since whittled it down to half a dozen.

Alice labels them her “trusted inner circle” and says six is her “perfect number” — not forgetting her seventh, Mrs Smith.

She says: “The first man I met was in his late 30s, single and worked in . I called him The Palate Cleanser because he introduced me to .”

“Next I met a man who was ten years younger than me — I labelled him The Toyboy — and it lasted a few months, but he’s now monogamous.

“Next I met The Director, who directs what happens in the bedroom. He’s in an open marriage.

“At the moment I am into The Knight — I gave him that name because he’s in the armed forces.

“I love him dearly, he’s often away for work but we meet once a month and talk on the phone three or four times a week.

“I met The Smiths at a swingers’ social I go to most weeks at a local bar in Bournemouth.

“They seem so normal and yet they are far from it.” Alice insists that there is more to her interactions than just sex.

She says: “They provide not only sex, but love and friendship too. They’re a huge part of my support network and I love them all dearly for different reasons.

“They meet my different needs depending how I feel.

“The Knight loves talking about , while The Baker is obsessed with motocross bikes. I find his passion sexy.

“Some of them I see once or twice a week and we are always intimate. Others I see every month or so depending on who is free and the mood I’m in. These are actual relationships.”

And if that list wasn’t enough, Alice also has sex with men and women she meets at swingers events and socials around Bournemouth.

She says: “I’m sure people will call me promiscuous, but it’s all done with love, consent and honesty, so I feel extremely happy with my life. I’m not hurting anyone.

“I always have safe sex by using condoms. It’s a popular misconception that the swinging community is riddled with STIs.

“I’m not there to be picked up and dropped. While I understand arrangements might need to be changed, I expect open and honest communication from all my lovers.

“They need to have a brain and be interested in my life, not just my body.”

Last year, Alice left the NHS and now runs her own social night for swingers in Bournemouth under her pseudonym Miss Mae, as well as running a kinky .

But her lifestyle doesn’t come without its issues.

Alice says: “I’ve had my heart broken because some of my lovers have wanted to be monogamous and have found someone to do that with.

“Just because they aren’t the only people I sleep with doesn’t mean I don’t love them.”

Alice also refutes any suggestion that her relationships are superficial.

“Some would say that I’m all about sex but that isn’t true,” she says.

“Yes, I do have a high sex drive, but even if for some reason I couldn’t have sex again I’d still want to be close to multiple people. That wouldn’t change.”

• *Name has been changed