My world crumbled when kids were taken away over £40k ketamine addiction… here’s why it’s best thing that ever happened

GENTLY shaking her three-year-old daughter awake, Victoria Vigors was about to do the unimaginable and say goodbye to her two young children.

She’d been a full-time, hands-on mum since welcoming her eldest a decade earlier but it would be four long months before Victoria would even hear their voices again.

That was four years ago, when she was in the grips of a crippling ketamine addiction that saw her blow £40k on the class B drug, and her children , aged ten and three at the time, were taken from her care to live with their dad.

After spending almost “24/7” with her kids, even home-schooling both of them for five months, it would be 18 months before they would be reunited.

Now 40, and having recovered from her addiction, Victoria says the “rock bottom” moment was a blessing in disguise, even calling it the best thing that ever happened to her.

The stark wake-up call was the start of a new dawn for the mum, who has been able to turn her life around and is rebuilding her relationship with her children.

Victoria’s story shares similarities with that of ex glamour model, Katie Price , whose children, Junior and Princess , were placed in their dad Peter Andre ’s care in childhood, a decision enforced by the family courts in 2019.

In a statement, Peter, 52, revealed the decision had been made for their ‘safety’ and the courts ruled that the children, now 19 and 18, would remain in his care until adulthood.

Victoria, who lives in Higham, Kent , can relate: “I know how it feels to have your children going to live with their dad, and it’s heartbreaking.

“But it can be very much the right thing for them in the long run – and it doesn’t mean you aren’t a good mum.

“Bad mums would give up and walk away, but what makes us good mums is that we continue to fight for our children, and continue to do better.

“In the end, my children being taken away turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me.”

For Victoria, that break was enforced when she finally admitted to having an addiction after she had been taken to hospital following pains she suffered as a result of her drug use.

Her case was immediately referred to social services, who she says gave her 15 minutes to say goodbye to her children before their father picked them up.

Victoria says: “My daughter was napping at the time, and it was horrific having to wake her up and explain to them both that they had to go and live at daddy’s house.

“They were aged ten and three at the time and too young to understand what was happening, they just knew that mummy was poorly. They were crying and confused – they didn’t understand.

“It was absolutely devastating.

“It was like my world had come crashing down, and I had no idea how I would get through it.”

It was in 2020 that Victoria tried ketamine for the first time.

Struggling to cope with the demands of parenting and home-schooling during the Covid 19 pandemic , she went from drinking a glass of wine to micro-dosing the drug, taking small amounts called “bumps” frequently throughout the day to avoid becoming too intoxicated.

While she initially found it boosted her mood and made life seem more manageable, Victoria soon fell into a terrifying addiction , needing more and more “bumps” to function.

She says: “I felt so alone, isolated and unable to be a good mother.

“Both of the kids’ dads were key workers during lockdown and couldn’t have them on the weekends, so I was looking after them 24/7, living in a flat with no garden or balcony, and trying to juggle their very different needs due to their age difference.

“It all just got too much and I felt like I couldn’t cope.

“It seemed like all the other mums were coping well and had support, and I felt like a complete failure.

“I was drinking too much and put on four stone from drinking – so I knew that had to stop.

“A friend suggested trying ketamine and sent over the number of a supplier.

“It felt like an instant anti-depressant without all the negative side effects of alcohol .

A friend suggested trying ketamine and sent over the number of a supplier. It felt like an instant anti-depressant without all the negative side effects of alcohol

“I was terrified of going into a ‘k-hole’ – a dissociative state from having too much – so I never did more than a tiny bump at a time and microdosing daily.

“However, my tolerance became so high I was having to use more to get the same effect with each bump.

“Because I was microdosing, it didn’t really impact my parenting at first.

“I was able to go about my daily life but just feeling happy, relaxed and content.

“I would do a bump as soon as I woke up and then another every two hours until I went to bed.”

‘So much agony‘

But issues soon started to arise, with Victoria suffering chronic pain because of the drug – which ultimately affected her ability to properly parent .

She says: “Some days I couldn’t even stand up, so I’d be parenting from bed – which was ridiculous and unfair on my children.

“I’d be snappy and have little patience and I couldn’t cook them proper meals – I’d just order takeaways like McDonald’s, KFC or a Chinese.

“I would have to ask their dad to pick them up because I would be in so much agony.”

Her drug use was taking an even more noticeable toll on her physically, stealing her body, and her identity.

“My addiction took everything from me, she recalls.

“My skin was awful, my hair was thin and falling out, and I had no dignity or self-respect.

“At the time, I genuinely believed the only way I could cope and get through the day was to be under the influence of something – and ketamine was my drug of choice.”

While her children “never witnessed anything they shouldn’t”, by 2021 Victoria was spending £500 a week on the drug, funding her addiction with her savings , and was often hospitalised twelve times due to the pain – with hospital pain relief not touching the sides due to her high tolerance for drugs .

In October of that year, she finally confessed her addiction to doctors, and the courts intervened, removing her children from her care.

If it was up to me, at the time I’d have chosen to get clean with them still under my care

Victoria was blocked from having contact with her son and daughter for four months, when the courts allowed her to call them three times a week, as she battled for sobriety.

While she was able to see her son, who was older, after six months, the mum-of-two was required to produce a year’s worth of clean drug testing before she could reunite with her daughter to prove she could get, and stay, clean – which ultimately took 18 months, due to traces of the drug remaining in her hair.

She started with supervised visits, then moving onto unsupervised but not overnight, and eventually she was able to have her children unsupervised.

Victoria, a content creator, says: “If it was up to me, at the time I’d have chosen to get clean with them still under my care.

“In my crazy way of thinking back then they were my only reason to get clean, so I didn’t want them to be taken away.

‘Best version of myself‘

“But going to therapy helped me realise that I had lost my identity after becoming a mum.

“I knew I’d eventually be able to get them back, but I didn’t want to slip back into my old ways and make the same mistakes.

“Having them full-time was too much for me, and wouldn’t work if I wanted to stay in recovery.

“I had to put them – and myself – first.

“They had also had to move to a new school and home, and I didn’t want to disrupt them further.”

Eventually, it was agreed that Victoria would have the children on weekends and during school holidays – as well as having open access to them at any other time.

I needed to get to rock bottom in order to claw my way back up

And with time, Victoria has come to see temporarily losing her children as the “best thing that ever happened to her”.

She adds: “I needed to get to rock bottom in order to claw my way back up.

“I’m able to be the best version of myself now, and be the mum I always wanted to be – but felt like I couldn’t be without drugs.

“I felt like such a failure in the beginning, but now I don’t feel like a burden, or like I’ve let my kids down.”

Now, she and her children are “making up for lost time”.

Victoria says: “Because I have so much more freedom, I spend time planning at least one memory-making activity every time I see the kids.

“Our first Christmas back together, we went on the Polar Express train.

“I’ve also taken them to see Lion King on the West End , and stayed at Alton Towers and Legoland twice each.

“We’ve been on holiday to Lanzarote , we go go-karting, do laser tag, and spend days at the beach.

“But the most important thing is that we have quality time together.

“Whatever they want me to play with them, I’m playing.

“I watch every cartwheel, every jump on the trampoline, and clap. I cheer for them at every school event.

“I do it all enthusiastically and with all the energy that a mum should bring.

Thankfully, I’ve been able to turn this around, and losing my children temporarily has made me a much better mum

“And that’s the great gift of all – for me and my children.”

Now he is almost 15, Victoria has been open with her son about what she went through, in a bid to make sure it never happens to him.

She says: “It’s important to me to explain the concept of addiction and alcohol or drug misuse at a young age. I don’t want him going down the same path that I did.

“Addiction can happen before you know it – and the results can ruin your life.

“Thankfully, I’ve been able to turn this around, and losing my children temporarily has made me a much better mum.”