THE streets of a handful of British towns and cities were this week filled with giant balls . . .
And what they were witnessing really was the biggest load of b*****ks ever seen.
ITV’s new show Let’s Play Ball is currently filming and features a handful of celebrities competing with each other to roll these huge spheres through the country Credit: Alamy
Josie Gibson and Rob Beckett were spotted filming Credit: Alamy
Soon the rest of the country will have to see it too, as the sad farce that is Let’s Play Ball is broadcast to the nation.
Bilge posing as light entertainment, ITV’s new idea is currently filming and features a handful of celebrities competing with each other to roll these huge spheres through the country.
And, well, that’s pretty much it, folks. I hope you weren’t expecting anything innovative or clever?
The only thing remarkable is the fact that telly chiefs have turned, once again, to a foreign format in a frantic bid to create some sort of left-field new era for TV. Because is actually developed in Holland, where, crucially, also originated.
Ever since the Beeb’s wink-murder show became a breakout hit in 2022, execs have searched overseas for its successor.
Except The Traitors’ success was the telly equivalent of a lightning bolt. Determined that it strike more than once, they have increasingly looked abroad for similar shows, without much luck.
Last year, one of the biggest flops in BBC One history came with , with Davina McCall, which was our stab at making a show that originated in Belgium.
And 2025 was also when suffered one of its biggest turkeys with The Genius Game fronted by David Tennant and a replica of a show birthed in South Korea.
Surely, two of the worst imports since bubonic plague and Abu Hamza.
The list goes on, however. ITV’s The Summit aired in February and was peak boring. It was based on an Australian show of the same name.
Don’t think the pain will end anytime soon, either. The BBC will imminently air Race Against The Tide.
Based on the Canadian show, it sees teams build sandcastles on a beach as waves quickly approach. Now, just go back and read that last sentence and tell me British TV is still the envy of the world.
Let’s Play Ball is actually developed in Holland, where, crucially, The Traitors also originated Credit: BBC
It used to be. Within my lifetime, home-grown shows such as Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, Strictly, Bake Off, The Chase, Top Gear, Downton Abbey, The Office have all been broadcast or replicated in hundreds of territories around the globe.
Tellingly, the newest on that list, The Chase, is now 17 years old, and these days very few seem to be dominating like they used to.
Which suggests that, despite their massive wages and even bigger egos, the latest generation of TV bosses lack imagination or an instinct for what interests regular Brits.
But just because they can’t organise a p**s-up in a brewery, doesn’t mean they should copy other country’s s**t shows.
KISS MISSED MARK
I KISSED A Girl is a sort of lesbian Love Island which returned this week for its second and final series.
So why hasn’t this BBC show – and its cousin I Kissed A Boy – lasted?
Because it’s an agonising cringefest, for anyone of any persuasion.
For starters, the contestants seem obsessed with the politics of roles rather than personality or looks.
Episode one saw them constantly talking about wanting a woman who is feminine (which you might think was a prerequisite), or masculine presenting and feminine underneath, or feminine presenting and masculine underneath.
One girl even said her ideal woman would look like Ibiza Final Boss.
Bewildered yet?
Well, just wait until the prospective couples meet. It’s not a time-honoured handshake or air kiss.
Oh no, before saying hello they actually greet each other with a full-on snog, which is then filmed from every conceivable angle.
Then they publicly rate said snog, and from there they might reverse engineer a romance.
Or they might not.
They might go off with someone else minutes later.
In short, I Kissed A Girl manages the feat of being trashier than Love Island. Surely, the kiss of death for any show.
Super, supernatural worth a binge
Widow’s Bay is worth a binge Credit: Apple TV
THE final episode of Widow’s Bay recently dropped on TV.
If you haven’t seen this series, I recommend you binge the whole thing now. It’s brilliantly uncomfortable viewing.
The US thriller stars British actor Matthew Rhys as a widower living on an island that seems cursed by every supernatural occurrence imaginable.
He’s also the mayor, and is keen to revive the image of his home. So he sets about trying prove it’s all superstitious nonsense. In the process, however, he discovers it’s all true.
Cleverly, it manages to be as terrifying as it is funny, because along the way he encounters everything from the Bogeyman to witches, one of whom turns out to be the mayor’s hysterical assistant, Patricia.
There’s even an ancient sea hag who kills men by sitting on their faces.
Like I said, uncomfortable.
RICKY A BAFTA WINNER
RICKY GERVAIS tantalised us this week with the prospect of taking over hosting duties at the Baftas.
The former star of The Office and Extras became infamous for his roastings at the Golden Globes, when he outrageously slated some of the most powerful people on the planet to their faces.
Compare that to the more woke hosts of the Baftas, who practically have to be surgically removed from the bowels of the luvvies in the audience.
Ricky insisted he wouldn’t hold back just because he was in Blighty, too.
“If I did it, I’d really have to go for it and I don’t know if they’d like it,” he said. “But I wouldn’t care.”
Well, hallelujah! If the Baftas really are about championing a liberal society and free speech, then they need to hire Mr Gervais next year.
Perhaps we’ll get some belting moments like the time he made a gag at the Globes about Leonardo DiCaprio – who likes a younger woman – as the actor was sitting feet away from him.
Ricky said: “The film Once Upon A Time in Hollywood is nearly three hours long. Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere, and by the time the film was over, his date was too old for him. Even Prince Andrew’s like, come on . . . ”
Make. This. Happen.
HARLAN COBEN adaptations are kind of the thick-sliced white loaf of TV dramas.
They are such low-hanging fruit for snobs who are now growing in disturbing numbers.
There are so many shows around that people can be more discerning. When I was a kid, the choice was usually between watching The Thorn Birds or repeats of Blake’s Seven.
The latest Coben tale to make it on to our screens is I Will find You, on Netflix. Macbeth it ain’t, but it is a pretty exhilarating thriller which will keep you hooked from the start.
Meanwhile, all the joy sponges will be watching some Scandi-noir borefest on BBC Four.
A REMINDER this week of how utterly pointless any TV history programme is unless it relates to any period after 1940.
The American Revolution on the BBC looked back on the US Declaration of Independence 250 years ago.
But, as you can imagine, there wasn’t much in the way of live footage from the 18th century, so what you end up with is a podcast with virtually redundant imagery.
Why don’t they just turn these narratives into a drama, albeit one packed with artistic licence.
The Beeb always likes to rewrite history, why not give it carte blanche?
Eze Chidiebere Paul
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