I turned 40 recently, and being a reflective person, I thought about my journey, the lessons, and the unwavering spirit that has shaped my life. At this pivotal age, I celebrate not just the years I lived, but the wisdom earned, the values embraced, and the vision that continues to guide my path forward. I realise that for me and my kind, our lifestyle isn’t about perfection but about progress. It’s about choosing the long game, betting on oneself, and staying grounded in values that transcend trends.
Four timeless principles have defined my life so far: the power of delayed gratification, the pursuit of excellence, unwavering self-belief, and a life deeply rooted in Faith.
The Power of Delayed Gratification
We live in a world that moves at lightning speed, where instant gratification is the norm and distractions are endless, and living a life of depth and intention is a radical act. Though our present world often glorifies quick wins, my 40-year-old self has learned the quiet strength of patience over the years. I have made peace with the fact that instant gratification may offer fleeting pleasure, but it is delayed gratification that builds legacies. Whether in relationships, career, or personal growth, the choice to wait, nurture and invest deeply has led to bonds that are meaningful and enduring. I have understood that the best things in life are not rushed; they are cultivated.
Everything around us points to immediacy. From one-click purchases to instant messaging, fast food, binge-watching TV, and many more, everything is being designed to deliver or reward now. But when it comes to relationships, whether romantic, familial, or professional, instant gratification often leads to shallow connections. Lasting relationships are built on patience, trust, and the willingness to invest over time. Delayed gratification teaches us to listen more, to give without expecting immediate returns, and to nurture bonds that grow stronger with time. It’s about resisting the urge to cut corners or chase quick validation. Instead, it’s choosing to show up consistently, to communicate with intention, and to build trust brick by brick.
This principle also applies to how we relate to ourselves. When we delay gratification, we prioritise long-term growth over short-term comfort. We starve the need for immediate satisfaction and pleasure, where the rewards or benefits are experienced in the present moment, and choose discipline over lenience. In doing so, we create a life that is rich in substance and connection.
The Pursuit of Excellence
The moment you realise that excellence is not an act but a habit, it completely changes your perspective on life. For me, the pursuit of excellence has never been about competition but about my identity. It is about showing up, standing out, and being heard in every room. It is not for applause but because mediocrity is simply not an option. Naturally, excellence has a way of showing you off; anything done properly will announce itself. This commitment to high standards has become my compass, guiding every decision and every endeavour with integrity and intention.
Over the years, I have learned that excellence isn’t about being better than others, but it is about being the best version of yourself. It’s a mindset, a standard, and a commitment to showing up fully in every area of life. Whether it’s your career, your craft, or your character, excellence demands consistency, courage and clarity.
To stand out in today’s noisy world, you must be intentional. Excellence means doing the work even when no one is watching. It means refining your skills, owning your voice, and refusing to settle for mediocrity. It’s about being seen, not for the sake of ego, but because your presence, your ideas, and your contributions matter. But note that the pursuit of excellence requires resilience. There will be setbacks, critics, and moments of doubt. But when excellence is your baseline, you don’t crumble; instead, you recalibrate. You keep going, not because it’s easy, but because it’s worth it.
The Unwavering Belief in Oneself
If there’s one truth that becomes clearer with time, it is the phrase that the best person to bet on is yourself. No one else will care about your dreams as much as you do. No one else will fight for your vision with the same fire. That is why self-belief isn’t optional; it’s essential.
Banking on yourself means trusting your instincts, honouring your boundaries, and staying laser-focused on your goals. It means not settling for less than you deserve and not giving your energy to people or situations that drain your spirit. It’s about being discerning, especially when it comes to who you allow into your inner circle. Their energy impacts your ability to achieve your goals. For example, some people in your inner circle may offer backend compliments that on the surface sound good; however, in hindsight, in your reflective moment, may present another meaning.
Sometimes, the biggest dream killers come disguised as friends or family, howbeit unintentionally. Their doubts, fears, or projections can cloud your clarity if you’re not careful. That’s why it’s crucial to protect your vision with a strong self-belief game; they are your survival skills. Surround yourself with people who challenge you to grow, who celebrate your wins, and who remind you of your worth when you forget. My journey has revealed that not everyone clapping is in your corner, so be careful and never hand over the pen that writes your story to someone else.
Be Firmly Rooted in Faith
Amid the noise, the distractions, and the detours, faith has been my anchor. It has provided me with clarity when the path was unclear, strength when the journey was heavy, and peace when the world was loud. By 40, my faith is not just a belief; it has become the foundation for everything I have and hold dear. It is the quiet confidence that no matter the storm, I am held, guided, and destined for more. I have learned that faith doesn’t eliminate fear, but it gives you the strength to move forward anyway.
So, whether you’re turning 40, 25, or 60, these principles remain timeless. I want you to learn that these celebrations are not just about age, but they’re about your evolution, to ‘becoming’ more. It is about the courage to grow, the discipline to stay on the course, and the grace to keep believing. It’s about waking up each day with a clear sense of who you are, what you stand for, and where you’re headed.
Delayed gratification, excellence, self-belief, and exercise of faith are soul-level commitments. They shape how you love, how you lead, and how you live. The best part is that it is never too late to start. Every day is a new opportunity to align your life with your values, to show up with intention, and to become the person you were always meant to be. The best is not behind you. It’s just beginning.
This is dedicated to everyone celebrating a milestone birthday.
